letras de (the mark, tom and travis show...)

por dnl.182 Jue Jun 11, 2009 3:33 pm

Estas letras estan complementadas con los comentarios que hacen mark y tom despues de cada cancion.

Dumpweed

It’s understood, I said it many ways
Too scared to run, I’m too scared to stay
I said I’d leave, I could never leave her
And if I did, you know I’d never cheat her

But this I ask, it’s what I want to know
How would you feel, if I should choose to go
Another guy, you think it’d be unlikely
Another guy, you think he’d wanna fight me

She’s a dove, she’s a fucking nightmare
Unpredictable, it was my mistake to stay here
On the go, it’s way too late to play
I need a girl that I can train

I heard it once, I’m sure I heard it twice
My dad used to give me all of his advice
He would say “you gotta turn your back and run now
Come on, son, you haven’t got a chance now”
She’s a dove, she’s a fucking nightmare
Unpredictable, it was my mistake to stay here
On the go and it’s way too late to play
I need a girl that I can train

She’s a dove, she’s a fucking nightmare
Unpredictable, it was my mistake to stay here
On the go and it’s way too late to play
I need a girl that I can train

Need a girl that I can train
Need a girl that I can train
Turn your back and run now
You haven’t got a chance now

Need a girl that I can train
Need a girl that I can train
Turn your back and run now
You haven’t got a chance now

Tom: Woh!! Hey,I’m fuckin’ in the mood…the party!!!

Mark: Hey allright!!!

Tom: We’re fuckin’ allright!!!

Hey you know what we’re gonna do tonight? A whole lotta fuckin’…

Mark: We’re all gonna get laid!!!

This song is abour my herpes,it’s called “Dont Leave Me”,and it goes like this…

Don’t Leave Me

Don’t leave me all alone
Just drop me off at home
I’ll be fine, it’s not the first
Just like last time, but a little worse

And she said that I’m not the one that she thinks about and
She said it stopped being fun, I just bring her down
I said “don’t let your future be destroyed by my past”
She said “don’t let my door hit your ass”

One more chance, I’ll try this time
I’ll give you yours, I won’t take mine
I’ll listen up, pretend to care
Go on ahead, I’ll meet you there

And she said that I’m not the one that she thinks about and
She said it stopped being fun, I just bring her down
I said “don’t let your future be destroyed by my past”
She said “don’t let my door hit your ass”

( Mark: Bass solo !!)

Let’s try this one more time with feeling
One more time with feeling
One more time with feeling
One more time with feeling

She said that I’m not the one that she thinks about and
She said it stopped being fun, I just bring her down
I said “don’t let your future be destroyed by my past”
She said “don’t let my door hit your ass”

Don’t leave me all alone
Just drop me off at home
And I’ll be fine

Tom: You will be fine you fucking asshole! Woh!!!!

Burp!! Excuse me!!

Mark: Thank you…

Tom: Hey…hey Mark… We have a very special person here that wants to say hi…

guys this is Satan…

Satan: Hello kids…If you guys will take off your pants, then maybe I’ll be a little more happy… I wanna have fun with you but I’m gonna have to see your dicks,plural… I have to go away now, because there is another song…

And I got a boner… you guys mind if I did a boner kids??

Aliens Exist

Hey mom, there’s something in the backroom
Hope it’s not the creatures from above
You used to read me stories, as if my dreams were boring
We all know conspiracies are dumb

What if people knew that these were real (real)
I’d leave my closet door open all night
I know the CIA would say “what you hear is all hearsay”
Wish someone would tell me what was right

Up all night long
And there’s something very wrong
And I know it must be late
Been gone since yesterday
I’m not like you guys
I’m not like you

I am still the skeptic, yes, you know me (you know me)
Been best friends and will be ’til we die (die)
I got an injection of love from the erection
My best friend thinks I’m just humping guys, alright

Up all night long
And there’s something very wrong
And I know it must be late
Been gone since yesterday
I’m not like you guys
I’m not like you

Dark and scary, ordinary
Explanation, information
Nice to know ya, paranoia
Where’s my mother, biofather

Up all night long
And there’s something very wrong
And I know it must be late
Been gone since yesterday
I’m not like you guys
Twelve majestic lies

Mark: Tom has sex with guys…

Tom: Hey Mark! Who here thinks that I look very similar to Tom Cruise???

(crowd cheers) Thank you…I think so too…

Mark: Yeah…like Tom Cruise in that movie,”Born in the fourth of July”,that one?

Where he’s handicap, retarted,stupid,nobody likes him,he just shits all over himself,he’s a fucking asshole…Hey!!!

Tom: That was mean…

Mark: That’s right…

Tom: Never attack somebody that shits on himself…

You guys think it’s weird?? To shit your pants when you’re sleeping?

Not that I do it…but I did it last night,and I haven’t taken a shower since,and I’m wondering if that’s what smells…

Haha…poo-poo ca-ca…

Mark: Hey I wrote this next song,wanna hear it??

Tom: You don’t have a choice…

Mark: It goes like this…

Family Reunion

Shit piss fuck cunt cock sucker motherfucker tits fart turd n’ twat,

Shit piss fuck cunt cock sucker motherfucker tits fart turd n’ twat,

Shit piss fuck cunt cock sucker motherfucker tits fart turd n’ twat,

Shit piss fuck cunt cock sucker motherfucker tits fart turd n’ twat,

I fuck your mom…

Mark: Thank you…thank you so very very much… Hey this next song is about falling in love

Tom: What’s it about?

Mark: This song is about love,let’s give it up for love!…

Tom: I’ll tell you what I love…

Mark: You know what the best part of falling in love is?

Tom: Sex…

Mark: It’s the oral sex,that’s right…

Tom: Pleasure…

Going Away To College

Please take me by the hand
It’s so cold out tonight
I’ll put blankets on the bed
I won’t turn out the light

Just don’t forget to
Think about me
And I won’t forget you
“I’ll write you once a week”, she said

Why does it feel the same
To fall in love or break it off
And if young love is just a game
Then I must have missed the kick off

Don’t depend on me
To ever follow through on
Anything, but
I’d go through Hell for you and

I haven’t been this scared in a long time
And I’m so unprepared, so here’s your valentine
Bouquet of clumsy words, a simple melody
This world’s an ugly place, but you’re so beautiful Skylee!!

I’ll think about the times
She kissed me after class and
She put up with my friends
I acted like an ass

I’d ditch my lecture
To watch the girls play soccer
Is my picture
Still hanging in her locker?

I haven’t been this scared in a long time
And I’m so unprepared, so here’s your valentine
Bouquet of clumsy words, a simple melody
This world’s an ugly place, but you’re so beautiful

I haven’t been this scared in a long time
And I’m so unprepared, so here’s your valentine
Bouquet of clumsy words, a simple melody
This world’s an ugly place, but you’re so beautiful Tom,Travis!!!

Tom: Hey Mark…!!

Mark: Hey,if you guys are anything like me,you like to dress up in your mother’s underwear

and walk around the house trying to seduce your father…….what,just me?

Tom: I’m like you,I tryied to seduce your dad…

Mark: Hey remember that one time when I walked over to your house,

and your brother was there with the peanut-butter spread all over his weiner,and he’s all

“Come here boy,come here,come here boy…”

Give it up for Tom!!

Tom: This song is really hard to play…

It’s really hard to play,I would appreciate it if you don’t listen to me for the next 2.5 minutes allright?

Shut the fuck up!!!!

What’s My Age Again

I took her out, it was a Friday night
I wore cologne to get the feeling right
We started makin’ out and she took off my pants
But then, I turned on the TV

And that’s about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
And are still more amused by TV shows
What the hell is ADD, my friends say I should act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?

Then later on, on the drive home
I called her mom from a pay phone
I said I was the cops and your husband’s in jail
This state looks down on sodomy

And that’s about the time that bitch hung up on me
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
And are still more amused by prank phone calls
What the hell is call ID, my friends say I should act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?

And that’s about the time she walked away from me
Nobody likes you when you’re 23
And you still act like you’re in freshman year
What the hell is wrong with me, my friends say I should act my age
What’s my age again?

That’s about the time that she broke up with me (what’s my age again?)
No one should take themselves so seriously
With many years ahead to fall in line
Why would you wish that on me, I’ll never wanna act my age
What’s my age again?
What’s my age again?

Where’s my agent friend?

Mark: Fuck ya all!!

Tom: Hey Mark…I’m starting to get sweaty…

Contrary what most people think,I think I look better wet…

I’ve been campaining this for about two years now…

So throughout the show,you will see me getting sexier and sexier as it gets hotter and hotter…you know?

Mark: And…

Tom: And what?

Mark: If you watch closer now,you might watch Tom gettin fatter and fatter as the show goes on too…

Tom: Why would I be getting fatter???

Mark: ‘Cause…

Tom: Boobies!!!!!!

Mark: Oh,jeez…stop it…no…

Tom: But you’re too young…

Mark: You’re way too young…gosh…

Let me tell you why you’re gonna get fatter and fatter…’cause dog semance is full of calories…

Tom: Yeah,don’t eat dog semance, we hear that there’s a…

It’s the number one ’cause of…bad breath…

Tom (in another discussion): Hey this song is about when I had too much alcohol and got kicked out of high-school,

I wrote a song,and it goes like this…

Mark: Well here here it goes…

por dnl.182 Jue Jun 11, 2009 3:38 pm

Rich Lips

Please mom
You ground me all the time
I know that I was right all along

And I’m hoping
Remember I’m a kid
I know not what I did
Just having fun

You couldn’t wait for something new
And yesterday I thought of you
It left me to think as if I couldn’t walk away
It’s too late, I fell through

Nothing to lose
A boy who went out
When he finished all his chores
Nothing to do
They can’t trust me
Because I blew it once before

Shit dad
Please don’t kick my ass
I know I’ve seen you trashed
At least one time

Can I blame it
On one of my dumb friends
It’s been awhile
Since I have used that line

You couldn’t wait for something new
And yesterday I thought of you
It left me to think as if I couldn’t walk away
It’s too late, I fell through

Nothing to lose
A boy who went out
When he finished all his chores
Nothing to do
They can’t trust me
Because I blew it once before

Allright!!!

Nothing to lose
A boy who went out
When he finished all his chores
Nothing to do
They can’t trust me
Because I blew it once before

Tom: Hey Mark…

Mark: What?? What the fuck do you want Tom…I’m sick of “Hey Mark,hey…hey Mark…hey look at this…

look at how I can make it bigger if I rubit,look at this…hey Mark,come here…”

Tom: No seriously Mark,hey Mark…I wasn’t really masturbating…

I’ve never done that…I was inspecting my testicles for weird bugs…

Mark: That’s what you say…If your parents catch you :

“I wasn’t masturbating,I was just cleaning it and it went of…”

Tom: You guys wanna hear a song that I wrote about 4 days ago???

You really don’t have a choice, ’cause we’ll be in to it…

Mark: Yeah,you guys will act like if you wanna hear it,’cause otherwise we’ll play it twice…

Tom: Yeah,you bastards…

The song goes like this…

Blow Job

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob,

It would be nice,to have a blowjob from your mom…

Untitled

I think of a while ago
We might of have had it all
I was so stupid then
You needed time to grow
But now just as things change
As well my feelings do
In time things rearrange
I am so sick of chasing you

But what do I get ’cause I just seem to lose
You make me regret those times I spent with you
And playing those games as I wait for your call
And now I give up, so goodbye and so long

It’s not a change of pace
This time I’ll get it right
It’s not a change of taste
I was the one there last night

You have your other friends
They were there when you cried
Didn’t mean to hurt you then
Best friends just won’t leave your side

But what do I get ’cause I just seem to lose
You make me regret those times I spent with you
And playing those games as I wait for your call
And now I give up, so goodbye and so long

It’s not a change of pace
This time I’ll get it right
It’s not a change of taste
I was the one there last night

When I needed you most
When I needed a friend
You let me down now
Like I let you down then
So sorry, it’s over

Tom: Oh that song’s done,we’re done with that song now,you guys can rest…

Mark: Satan has something to say…

Satan: You guys having a good time tonight?? I’m having a hump ditt a lee do of a good time tonight…

I like poetry and flowers and pictures of unicorns…

Tom: Thousand of naked…oh

Satan: Thousand naked children molesting my weiner…oh…

Tom: Wait…what are the things that Satan loves?

Satan: Satan loves unicorns,pictures and poetry and long walks on the beach…

Tom: Hey pay attention you fuck…Boobies!!!!

Voyeur

And when the day ends I’m sure she feels sorrow
The lonely guy I like to watch her change
I’ve been here two days, I’ll sure be here tomorrow
I’d eat her all if she were on my dinner plate

And I wish, I wish she’d be more kind now
I’m out of luck cause the shades are pulled down
I’ve seen everything there is to be shown
I followed her all the way home

I can’t be too cool in a tree with my pants down
The air is cold and I’ve got splinters in my feet
She caught me once but I don’t think that she cares now
Unlike before her view is now blocked by a leaf

And I wish, I wish she’d be more kind now
I’m out of luck cause the shades are pulled down
I’ve seen everything there is to be shown
I followed her all the way home

I bet this last times the one time too many
The rush of waiting is burning through my head
Right after supper, her brother showers twice a week
He kicks my ass so much that filthy white inbred

I’ve made mistakes by looking in the wrong window
Her dad is big and I have never seen his face
I’ve been here two days I’ll sure be here tomorrow
My lady’s so sweet she likes to entertain

And I wish, I wish she’d be more kind now
I’m out of luck cause the shades are pulled down
I’ve seen everything there is to be shown
I followed her all the way home

I bet this last times the one time too many
The rush of waiting is burning through my head
Right after supper, her brother showers twice a week
He kicks my ass so much that filthy white inbred

Mark: Hang on…hang on…

Tom: Hey uh…

Mark: The song is not quite over yet but…

Tom: The song is not done…we have to prepare for the bass,guitar solo…

How’re you doin’?

Mark: I need oxygen to the stage please…

Tom: You need…

Mark: Oxygen and oral sex,to the stage please…

Tom: And maybe some of those male chromosomes,to the stage…

Mark: Here’s where I do the big bass solo people…

Give it up for me!!!

Tom: Here it comes…here it comes…

(End of the song)

Tom: I want all you kids to know,

that I’m gonna think of every single one of you tonight when I’m all alone inside my bunk…

Starting with you!!!!

I’m starting with you!

Mark: Hey this next song is for anybody that knew us before “Enema Of The State”

and it goes like this…

Pathetic

I know I’m pathetic I knew when she said it
A loser a bum’s what she called me when I drove her home
There’s no more waiting and sure no more wasting
I’ve done all I can
But she still wants to be left alone

You got, you got, you got to help me out
And I’ll try not to argue
No one, no one, no one likes a drop-out
Mistakes are hard to undo

Don’t pull me down this is where I belong
I think I’m different
But I’m the same and I’m wrong
Don’t pull me down this is where I belong
I think I’m different
This is where I belong

I think it’s disgusting believing and trusting
If I gave a fuck
There would be nothing for me to prove
Although it’s amusing, it’s slightly confusing
I’ve done all I can
But her ego is still hard to move

You got, you got, you got to help me out
And I’ll try not to argue
No one, no one, no one likes a drop-out
Mistakes are hard to undo

Don’t pull me down this is where I belong
I think I’m different
But I’m the same and I’m wrong
Don’t pull me down this is where I belong
I think I’m different
This is where I belong

Don’t pull me down this is where I belong
I think I’m different
This is where I belong

Tom: Hey you guys know…

Mark: Hey,are you guys having fun???

Tom: We’re professionals…

you might not have noticed that,but we are professionals at what we do…

We just professionally suck…and professionaly act like a bunch of assholes on stage…

that’s what we do…That’s just why God made us

Mark: Hey…You’d better wipe that shit eating grin your face ’cause this next song is a sad one…

And…more important than that,if you’re eating shit and grinning then today is probably not our day anyway,so…

Adam’s Song

I never thought I’d die alone
I laughed the loudest, who’d have known?
I traced the cord back to the wall
No wonder it was never plugged in at all

I took my time, I hurried up
The choice was mine, I didn’t think enough
I’m too depressed to go on
You’ll be sorry when I’m gone

I never conquered, rarely came
16 just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn’t wait to get outside

The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over, we’d survived
I couldn’t wait ’til I got home
To pass the time in my room alone

I never thought I’d die alone
Another six months, I’ll be unknown
Give all my things to all my friends
You’ll never step foot in my room again

You’ll close it off, board it up
Remember the time that I spilled the cup
Of apple juice in the hall
Please tell mom this is not her fault

I never conquered, rarely came
16 just held such better days
Days when I still felt alive
We couldn’t wait to get outside

The world was wide, too late to try
The tour was over, we’d survived
I couldn’t wait ’til I got home
To pass the time in my room alone

I never conquered, rarely came
Tomorrow holds such better days
Days when I can still feel alive
When I can’t wait to get outside

The world is wide, the time goes by
The tour is over, I’ve survived
I can’t wait ’til I get home
To pass the time in my room alone

Mark: Thanks a lot…

Tom: I want you all to say “fuck” with me…

1,2,3: Fuck!!!

Mark: “Fuck with me”…why?

Tom: Well,not really…you don’t see the “with me ” part…just the “fuck” part…

Mark: Oh…ok

Tom: Let’s try that one more time…I…

Mark: He just wants you to say “fuck”…but he wants you to say with him…

Tom: With me…

Mark: Ok go ahead,try again Tom…

Tom: Ok do I count to three and say…how do we do this???

Mark: There goes 1,2,3,fuck…

Tom: Ok…1,2,3,FUCK!!!!!

Mark: Here we go…song is called Peggy Sue,it goes like this…

Tom: ok…

por dnl.182 Jue Jun 11, 2009 3:41 pm

Peggy Sue

I know what it’s like to be alone sitting in your room
Listening to all the doubts that
Your parents have to say to you

And as your head gets all cluttered inside
Try to stay awake
Everything they say are lies
That’s all the shit that you ever have to take

So hold in all your aggressions
Because your grinding your teeth on down to
The bottom of your chin
It’s not easy or so damn pleasing
To not laugh at everything they say that
They tell you what to be, you’re not alone

I know what it’s like to be denied at everything you do
It’s not the same reason why that
Makes you change the things that you once knew

As your head gets all cluttered inside
Give more than you take
Everything they say are lies
That’s all the shit that you ever have to take

So hold in all your aggressions
Because your grinding your teeth on down to
The bottom of your chin
It’s not easy or so damn pleasing
To not laugh at everything they say that
They tell you what to be you’re not alone

You say you want to take off your shoes and
Walk barefoot down the street
Just to be the things that you can be
Just live for one more week

You say you want to take off your shoes just to
Walk barefoot down the street
Just to be the things that you can be
Just live for one more week

So hold in all your aggressions
Because your grinding your teeth on down to
The bottom of your chin
It’s not easy or so damn pleasing
To not laugh at every word they say that
They tell you what to be, you’re not alone

Tom: I choose to blame my parents for giving me a small,bend weiner,and an ugly face…

Hey you guys…you know what I noticed Mark??

Mark: Yes I do…

Tom: You know…you what I noticed???

Mark: Yes…

Tom: I noticed that throughout the many years of me playing with my own weiner,

it pends to the wrong side…I think I pulled it too far to the something to the right…

Hey,you guys care…?? There’s something seriously wrong on my dick kids,and I need your sympathy…

Wendy Clear

Let’s take the boat out on the bay
Forget your job for just one day
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad
It might be inappropriate because
Either way our band gets dropped, oh yeah
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad

But I’d play with fire to break the ice
And I’d play with a nuclear device
Is it something I’ll regret, why do I want what I can’t get?
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad

The three-date theory is getting old
Everyone’s getting left out in the cold
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad
So I’ll see you with another guy
Who pretends not to hear you when you cry, oh yeah
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad

But I’d play with fire to break the ice
And I’d play with a nuclear device
Is it something I’ll regret, why do I want what I can’t get?
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad

I’ll be movin’ on
Movin’ on
Movin’ on, on, on
Movin’ on
Movin’ on
Movin’ on, on, on

But I’d play with fire to break the ice
And I’d play with a nuclear device
Is it something I’ll regret, why do I want what I can’t get?
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad

I wish it didn’t have to be so bad
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad
I wish it didn’t have to be so bad

Tom: I wish it didn’t have to be so bad…

You guys wanna hear from Satan again??

Satan: Well hello kids,are you enjoying the show so far??

Chances are you’re all gonna get laid tonight…

I wanna sleep with every single person here…

starting with the retards…

Sorry kids,i’m not very funny anymore…

I’m having a hellish of a day

Tom: Wait…hey,Satan…

Satan: Yes Tom…

Tom: I was just wondering if I’m gonna get laid tonight…

Satan: Well no you’re not Tom…

Tom: Why not??

Satan: ‘Cause your dick is small,bend and ugly…

Tom: Allright…

AM I FUNNY OR WHAT???

Mark: Hey,I’m gonna tell you how its gonna work for the rest of the show here…

We’re gonna say that this is our last song, then we’re gonna play it,

then we’re gonna walk outstage, but we’re not really done here,

we’re gonna come back out and play two more songs even after that,so…

That’s how it works,you know how it works…

You’re going to see a band play, they walk outstage sayin’

“Thanks a lot,goodnight!”, and you know these motherfuckers

are gonna come back out and play two more songs anyway,so…

you know what?? At least we’re straight about it…

Tom: They call it an “encore”…

Mark: Yeah,it’s an “encore”…

Tom: “Encore”…say it with us kids…”encore”…

Carousel

I talk to you every now and then
I never felt so alone again
I stop to think at a wishing well
My thoughts send me on a carousel

Here I am standing on my own
Not a motion from the telephone
I know not a reason why
Solitude is a reason to die

Just you wait and see
As school life is a
It is a woken dream
Aren’t you feeling alone?

I guess its just another
I guess its just another
I guess its just another night alone

Now as I walk down the street
I need a job just to sleep in sheets
Buying food every once in a while
But not enough to purchase a smile

A tank of gas is a treasure to me
I know now that nothing is free
I talk to you every now and then
I never felt so alone again

Just you wait and see
As school life is a
It is a woken dream
Aren’t you feeling alone?

I guess its just another
I guess its just another
I guess its just another night alone

Satan: Hey my name is Satan,thanks alot for coming on down to the show tonight,hope
you all had a great time,I know I did. Those boy fellas sure put on a kick ass
show huh hope to see you all at the after show party. I’m going to start sucking
dicks and squeezing titties… Maybe I can put my pee-pee in your mouth…I love when
the kids come on over and I get them suck and kiss my pee-pee tenderly and
gently…I like it when the kids sit on my lap and talk about unicorns and flowers
and things like that maybe I’ll even fuck their butt, see you kids later!!!

Mark: Hey,how are you guys doin’ up in the back??

Now from the top,can I get an “amen”??

Now from the floor,can I get an “allelouya”??

Now from all these other assholes,can I get an “oh-yeah”??

All The Small Things

All the small things
True care, truth brings
I’ll take one lift
Your ride, best trip

Always, I know
You’ll be at my show
Watching, waiting
Commiserating

Say it ain’t so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Na na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na na

Late night, come home
Work sucks, I know
She left me roses by the stairs
Surprises let me know she cares

Say it ain’t so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Na na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na na
Na na na na na na na na na na

Say it ain’t so, I will not go
Turn the lights off, carry me home
Keep your head still, I’ll be your thrill
The night will go on, my little windmill

Say it ain’t so, I will not go (na na na na na na na na na na)
Turn the lights off, carry me home (na na na na na na na na na na)
Keep your head still, I’ll be your thrill (na na na na na na na na na na)
The night will go on, the night will go on (na na na na na na na na na na)
My little windmil

Mark: Hi…we’re back just like I said we’d be back…

You can leave now and beat the traffic…

Tom: Or beat your meat

Mark: Or you can stick around and beat your meat…

I like that…I think I’ll say that every night from now on…

“You can leave and beat the traffic, or stick around and beat your meat”

Satan: I have a few words to say about beating your meat…

I just heard you guys talking about masturbation,and I thought I’d show up…

I don’t know…I hope I’m not bothering you,so I’ll take off…

see you guys later…

Mark: Here’s my present for you people, I’m gonna stop talking now and play a song…thank you…

Tom: Surprise!!!

Mutt

He pauses shaving and he tells himself that he is the bomb
She has her curlers set, her credit cards are paying the funds
He’s not that old, I’ve been told, a strong sexual goal
He goes out everyday, she goes every way, oh yeah
They don’t even care at all

She’s open, waiting for more
And I know he’s only looking to score
And it is way too unhealthy, often they’ve typically
Been starved for attention before

She smokes a dozen and he doesn’t seem to notice the smell
He took the seat off his own bike, because the way that it felt
He wants to bone this, I know she is ready to blow
They go out every night, his pants are super tight, oh yeah
They don’t even care at all

She’s open, waiting for more (she’s open, waiting for more)
And I know he’s only looking to score (he’s only looking to score)
And it is way too unhealthy, often they’ve typically
Been starved for attention before

She’s open, waiting for more
And I know he’s only looking to score
And it is way too unhealthy, often they’ve typically
Been starved for attention before

Satan: Take off your pants!!!

Tom: We really love each other,we’re the best friends…

Fuck Mark,Travis…You guys mean a lot to me…know what I mean??

He needs an ointment…

Hey I think every pharmaceutical drug should be in ointment form,

and it could only go in your balls…you know??

Like if you got a cold, you gotta put an ointment on your balls…

The Country Song

Tom: Oh oh…oh oh…oh shit…oh fuck I’m gonna start dancin’…

Take of your pants,dad, your penis is the biggest thing my butt’s ever had,

‘Cause I know,it feels so good…Shut your fuckin’ face,uncle fucker…

Dammit

Tom: Take your pants off!!!

It’s alright to tell me what you think about me
I won’t try to argue or hold it against you
I know that you’re leaving, you must have your reasons
The season is calling your pictures are falling down

The steps that I retraced the sad look on your face
The timing and structure, did you hear, he fucked her
A day late a buck short I’m writing the report
On losing and failing when I move I’m flailing now

And it’s happened once again, I’ll turn to a friend
Someone that understands, sees through the master plan
But everybody’s gone and I’ve been here for too long
To face this on my own, well I guess this is growing up

And maybe I’ll see you at a movie, sneak preview
You show up and walk by on the arm of that guy
And I’ll smile and you’ll wave
We’ll pretend it’s okay
The charade, it won’t last
When he’s gone, I won’t come back

And it’ll happen once again, you’ll turn to a friend
Someone that understands, sees through the master plan
But everybody’s gone, and you’ve been there for too long,
To face this on your own, well I guess this is growing up

Well, I guess this is growing up

Mark: Allright!!!!!

Thanks a lot you guys!!!!

Wow!!!!

We’ll see you next time motherfuckers!!!!

Tom has no dick!!!!

No dick at all people!!!!

Thanks a lot and goodnight…

Man Overboard

So sorry it’s over
So sorry it’s over

There’s so much more than I wanted and
There’s so much more than I needed and
Time keeps moving on and on and on
Soon we’ll all be gone

Spent some time to talk this over
You’re out of line and rarely sober
We can’t depend on your excuses
Cause in the end it’s fucking useless

You can only lean on me for so long
Bring the ship about to watch a friend drown
Settle on the ledge
That you don’t come down
You can only lean on me for so long

Cover up the scars
Put on your game face
Left you in a bar
To try and save face

You can only lean on me for so long
Bring the ship about to watch a friend drown
Settle on the ledge
That you don’t come down
You can only lean on me for so long

So sorry it’s over
So sorry it’s over

There’s so much more that I wanted and
There’s so much more that I needed and
Time keeps moving on and on
Soon we’ll all be gone

Man on a mission
Can’t say I miss him around
Insider information
Can’t keep your resignation
Loss of a good friend
Best of intentions I found
Tight lip procrastination
Yeah later
See you around

por **RonYIIBlinkeR** Jue Jun 11, 2009 4:06 pm

q buen laburooooo

te mereces mis +20 xD

por **Magui** Jue Jun 11, 2009 5:23 pm

que buena ondaaa

buen post :)

por **ZAii_182** Jue Jun 11, 2009 5:58 pm

uh gracias! simpre m pregunte qe decian! grax!

por **nachoblinkero182** Jue Jun 11, 2009 8:29 pm

Eaa tremendo aporte
Me uno a Rony con el coso de +20 xD
Muchas gracias!!!

por **ALu_AnotherGirL** Jue Jun 11, 2009 10:18 pm

yo tmb te doy +20 letras de (the mark, tom and travis show...) 181845

muchas gracias por el laburo! letras de (the mark, tom and travis show...) 158659

por **-Vash-** Jue Jun 11, 2009 10:49 pm

Graaan laburo!! También doy mis puntos!! Y ahora tenés mas reputación que yo xD jajajaja

Gracias dln.182!!

por **Fedeb182** Vie Jun 12, 2009 12:47 am

Que buena onda =D
Grax! !

por dnl.182 Vie Jun 12, 2009 8:41 pm

y para los que tienen los tracks escodidos de este album
aqui estan las letras

21 – START MY OWN NUDIST COLONY (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: I'm going to come back and I'm going to start
a therapeutic massage center only for for... Mark:
I'm going to start my own nudist colony Tom: That
would be grose, you tried that in our bus one time
Mark: I tried to start our own nudist colony in
our bus and it was pretty much just me hanging out
naked

22 – FUCK EVERYBODY ELSE (HIDDEN TRACK)

they love you Tom Tom: They love me so fuck
everybody else Mark: Yea fuck all you guys out
there that are cheering, yea we hate you Tom you
suck dick burn in hell Tom: Yea fuck that, hey I
say I say fuck the hating Tom thing that's what I
say, are we ready Mark Mark: You know what it is
you know what it is a lot of these people are just
now hopping on the we hate Tom bandwagon, like
I've been hating tom since like 1995 I'm old
school hating Tom guy alright

23 – SAY SOME DIRTY WORDS (HIDDEN TRACK)

: Oh shit, hey
let's all say some dirty words, everybody say
fuck, everybody say shit, everyone say dick,
everyone say Mark's an ass hole Mark: Everyone
say, everyone say we hate Mark, yea Tom: Hey now
let's do this one, everyone say fuck fuck shit
fuck, that's the kind of words you should be using
at home kids Mark: That's right Tom: What do we do
now Mark: I want everyone to call me an ass hole
again

24 – I LIKE YOUR HATE (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: What's up I like your hair it's very
nice Mark: You like his hair oh cool thanks he
probably appreciates that a lot Tom: I wanted to
say I liked your but but I thought that was to
foward you know

25 – FOR ALL LADIES (HIDDEN TRACK)

Hey this next song is for
all the ladies in the hezouse, hea he it's for all
the ladies in the heoueoueouze Tom: Mark! Mark:
What Tom: Shut the fuck up Mark: It's for all the
ladies in the houaeiouze

26 – GOLF TOURNAMENT (HIDDEN TRACK)

weee. Hey you know what
hang on I want to make this like a Tom: (belch)
exuse me Mark: Exuse Tom Tom: Sorry Mark: I want
to make this like a big golf tournimant everyone
shut up everybody just clap like it's a golf
tourniment Tom: That's what it sounds like when I
get done having sex, 15,000 people cheering me on,
I could take all of you in my bed right fucking
now, but you're not invited Mark.

27 – A NOTE FROM YOUR MOM (HIDDEN TRACK)

You have got
giant boobs and I doubt you're 18, do you have a
note from your mom, I want to meet your mom...
Mark: Hey put those 13 year old boobs away, if I
wanted to see 13 year old boobs I'd hang out by
the Junior high like my dad like my dad does

28 – WHAT I LEARNED IN FIFTH GRADE (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom:
Hey you know what I learned in fifth grade Mark:
What's that your dad has a bent weiner Tom: My
dad's weiner was bigger than mine then and still
is

29 – FUCK YOU TOM (HIDDEN TRACK)

Mark: I want everyone here to scream, fuck you
Tom,we fucking hate you you're going to burn in
hell and die a horrible firery death cause' we
hate you stupid pieces of shit Tom: I heard that
Mark: Thanks

30 – SMELL LIKE BLOOD AND FECES (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: You want to give me your shirt,
this smells like blood and feces, dinner time ok
what does this say here Mark: It smells like blood
and feces, so it's your dad's shirt

31 – SAFE SEX (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: Hey uh
just like every other band we believe in a safe
form of sex don't we Mark, that we do so Mark's
going to tell you about how safe we are Mark: Let
me tell you about the safest form of sex, it's
when you get super drunk and you have sex with
like ten people totally unprotected and you do
intravenous drugs at the same time, no it's not
true Tom: It's not true you have to carry a
weapon.

32 – THE MOST SPECIAL KIND OF LOVE (HIDDEN TRACK)

How many of you guys have girlfriends and
how many of your girlfriends have guy friends, I
hope you're not having sex Mark: And more
importanly how many of your girlfriends have
girlfriends Tom: Cause' we believe in the love
that exists between two vaginas Mark: The most
special kind of love of all is the love that
exists between two naked women while I watch

33 – MY BONER JUST DIED (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom:
We need her to put her shirt back on Mark: Please
Tom: It just took away my boner, my boner just
died, I had one and now it's gone Mark: Please I
saw your boobs and my wiener ran away.

34 – SOME ONE LOST A CONTACT LENS (HIDDEN TRACK)

Hey hey
hang on everyone everyone seriously I need your
attention for just a second please, I think
somebody lost a contact down here so everyone look
around a contact lense hey someone lost a contact
lense so uh... Tom: I lost my virinity Mark: Keep
an I out for it Tom: I lost a testacle, hey what
if testacles were things you could lose on a
everyday basis that would suck, you've only got
three

35 – I GOTTA GO PEE-PEE (HIDDEN TRACK)

hey I've got to go pee pee Mark: Do you
want to go pee and I'll talk to the kids for a
second Tom: Do you think you can talk for enough
time Mark: No uh uh Tom: Why don't you gather your
thoughts Mark: Why don't you just wet your pants
and we'll call it even Tom: Should I just piss in
my pants right here, if you guys all pitch in a
dollar each I'll piss my pants right here now,
that should pay me about two-hundred bucks maybe
Mark: I'll give you three-hundred dollars to piss
your pants right now Tom: I'll give you
four-hundred bucks to eat my shit Mark: Sold Tom:
Sold

36 – I HURT KID (HIDDEN TRACK)

apparently there's a kid that's hurt right
now and I think they're helping them out right
now, it looks like they're right there Mark: Make
a hole people make a hole Tom: All you people over
there make way for the hurt kid and bring me their
wallet

37 – I WISH I TOOK BASS LESSONS (HIDDEN TRACK)

Mark: I wish now you know let me tell you
guys something... Tom: I'm gay! Mark: There's
thousands and thousands of people here today
there's like semis and fucking buses and multiple
bands and all kinds of shit, I wish now I would
have taken bass lessons, sorry sorry Tom: So do I,
I wish you did too Mark: I'm thinking for
Christmas this year I'm going to ask for lessons

38 – I KNOW A GUY (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: I know a guy, he has sex with his sister, he
used his dick to pop her four foot blister, and I
know it's not that cool, he fucked her in my
swimming pool, he's got three testacles, and he
loves to do shit, fuck yea. Hey how come every
time we say a joke it has to be about fucking sex
masturbation insest, or anything grose like that
you know Mark: Is there anything else in the world
Tom: There's nothing else to talk about

39 – EXCUSE ME, SECURITY GUARD (HIDDEN TRACK)

Mark: Hey
can you help that little girl out of there she's
not having so much fun right now, hey Tom: Uh
exuse me, security guard sir Mark: The one right
in front of you, yea Tom: Yea that girl right
there needs to come out, if you're a small person
the front is not the best view, and if you hate
seeing shitty bands any of this is not a good
view, this whole everything every seat here.

40 – MARK’S MIDDLE NAME (HIDDEN TRACK)

Mark's middle name is Rebecca, they thought he was
a... Mark: That's right, my middle names Rebecca
because my dad wanted a girl, he treats me like
one

41 – I STILL HAVE TO GO PEE (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: I still have to go pee and I'm holding it
in still, I'll piss my pants though for money,
I'll eat a nugget of my own poop for twenty bucks,
I'll pay you twenty bucks and I'll eat it

42 – YOU SHAVE YOUR ASS! (HIDDEN TRACK)

Mark:
You shave your ass Tom: You have hair on nothing
but your balls, Mark has no hair on his whole body
but a fucking wolverine growning in his pants, I
swear to God, it's got teeth and shit Mark: It's
true Tom: He's got a scary looking penis Mark:
It's true I need your tax deductable donations for
the shave Mark's balls program, please Tom: It's
for charity kids Mark: Please send what you can,
donate your time Tom: You guys think that we're
touring for our own, no this is a charity tour for
Mark's balls Mark: We're trying to raise enough
money to shave my nuts, please give generously
Tom: There's no metal strong enough to be the
teeth on any kind of electric shaver

43 – WE NEED A NEW GUITARIST (HIDDEN TRACK)

what do we
do now, oh I need a new guitar Mark: We need a new
guitar, we need a new guitarist, any one out there
play guitar Tom: Does anybody know how to play
guitar cause' I'm not very good, people don't
really respect me

44 – IF A WERE A GIRL (HIDDEN TRACK)

Mark: If I were a girl, every
time I went to the gynecologist, I'd fake an
orgasm

45 – SANTA WILL RAPE YOUR DOGS (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: Bad kids Mark: Bad christmas spirit
Tom: Bad christmas spirit Mark: Hey ok I need
light now Tom: We're going to point out every
single person that didn't sing Mark: Santa Claus
is going to come to your house and shit under all
your trees Tom: Santa Claus is going to come rape
your dogs

46 - I’M ASHAMED TO BE MYSELF (HIDDEN TRACK)

Oh God you know what I'm kind of
ashamed of being myself today, and yesterday and
the day before that, not really pround of who I am
or how I look. Any one have one of those days were
you don't even really like what you're wearing,
you know, you don't like how your hair looks, and
kind of bumed about how your penis is so small and
bent and wierd.

47- FUCK WIPING! (HIDDEN TRACK)

That is the ugliest but I have
ever seen. Let's hear it for not wiping! And this
guy fuck wiping dude, brings down the rain forest.
Ok this is a song I wrote... Mark: That guy has a
science fair project up his ass

48 - 7-UP (HIDDEN TRACK)

Tom: Uh what
head's up seven up, everyone close your eyes and
if I come by and if I come by and put my finger in
you but than you're the one.

49- LAST WORDS FRoM SATAN (HIDDEN TRACK)

I think that Satan
has a couple of comments: Well kids it's been a
really fun show, and I want you all to know that
we'll come back soon, but before I go I want to
say I think Tom is extemely good looking and all
the girls out there should think he's good
looking. Tom has one of the best butts that I've
ever seen, shimi shimi coco puff shimi shimi right
shimi shimi coco puff. Does anybody here want to
sleep with me. I'm really a nice guy, it's really
not Satan... It's me it's not Satan let's all be
happy he's not here say fuck Satan[/size]